Knighted!

When I was pregnant, a friend of mine said, "The best complement that I can be given as a parent is that my child is empathetic." Her statement hit me like a lightening bolt because someone who is empathetic is a good friend, has a charitable heart and a good steward of this world. Who wouldn't want to be called empathetic or better yet have their child exhibit that trait? I loved her statement and have carried it in my heart since then. 

Flash forward five and three quarter years (as my daughter would say). Last Tuesday started out great! It was my turn to pick up from school four of the cutest kindergarteners in the whole world, bring them back to our house to play for an hour and then take them to dance class. Right before I was walking out the door to get my ladies, I got an email from the school councilor saying that my daughter had been chosen to be knighted for exhibiting the virtue of tolerance. There was going to be a school assembly, and I needed to RSVP. I had no idea what that meant, but I quickly responded that we would be there and ran out the door.

The girls and I had so much fun! I even got them to dance class five minutes early (MAJOR ACCOMPLISHMENT!). As I was sitting there watching my daughter and her friends play, dance and be beautiful, carefree butterflies, I took a moment to reflect on the email that I have just received. I made a mental note to find out more information about what her honor really meant. Then, the unthinkable happend. My daughter slipped and knocked out her two front teeth. Mom panic needs to be its own post, but let's just say however you think that you will react to an accident, you will probably do the opposite.

An emergency trip to the dentist, consultation with the pediatrician, chocolate/vanilla swirl ice cream and trip to the toy store later, she was good as new minus two teeth, of course. What a day it had been!

So here's the scoop on her award. It's a program sponsored by the Rotary Club. It's called EarlyAct FirstKight Character Education Program. The Rotary Club goes into the school with real Knights. They put on a sword fight for the kids (apparently, it's the coolest thing... EVER). Then they tell stories about Knights that exhibit chivalry. In a nut shell, they are trying to make chivalry cool again! The Rotary Club president said that in schools where this program has been implemented, test scores have gone up, discipline problems have gone down and the students have a more positive view on school. They end the program with the 4 Way Test...

4 Way Test of the things we think, say or do
1. Is it the TRUTH?
2. Is it FAIR to all concerned?
3. Will it build GOODWILL and BETTER FRIENDSHIPS?
4. Will it be BENEFICIAL to all concerned?

Teachers and the school councilor then reinforce the 4 Way Test by using it in everyday situations in the classroom or the playground, etc.

So, my daughter was chosen by her teacher to be Knighted. Her grandparents, my husband and I were also honored onstage because the program teaches that the 4 Way Test must begin at home. Her teacher also read why she chose her to be Knighted. Here's what she said, "From the beginning of school, she has demonstrated the characteristics of tolerance in many different ways. She has been very kind, loyal and accepting towards all of her peers. She has shown respect and patience in the classroom, playground and other school settings. With the many choices we are faced with throughout the day, she is always thinking about the 4 Way Test and always makes the right choices."

I thought my proudest moment in my life was getting my Aggie Ring. Nope! It's seeing my daughter recognized for her beautiful heart.

Cheers!
Carolanne

Goodbye Christmas! Hello Clean House!

Before I lost my mind!

Sunday was the day. I couldn't take it any longer. No more red. No more green. No more gold. No more angels. No more ornaments. No more of anything having to do with Christmas. I decided to reclaim my house. The toys that only stay in the playroom had invaded my family room, dining room and even my bedroom. I wanted my clean, clutter free house back!

Dr. Phil says that everyday you ask yourself just how fun you are to live with. Well, on Sunday, I was no fun to live with at all. I barked orders at everybody to PICK UP! I assigned the four-year-old the task of taking everything that resembles a toy upstairs. If not, it was getting thrown away! I put "Thomas the Train" on for the baby so the TV could babysit him (not something that I condone, but sometimes its bloody necessary!). I put my husband to work. He was in charge of taking down everything that required a step ladder to put up. I got a big black garbage bag and started throwing away the thousands of boxes that once held toys. Then, I moved on to the tree. Like a tornado, I took down the ornaments that had taken hours to hang up. Tubs were filled and wreaths placed in bags for next year. Garland that had been so carefully hung a month before was shoved into contractor bags.

Here's my smartest move yet. Okay! Take notes! Our attic access is in the garage. I moved my husbands car out of the garage and filled his parking spot with the Christmas treasures. Now, he has motivation to move the decorations to the attic if he wants his spot back in the garage. So far, no success yet. I'll keep you posted!

After I said goodbye to Christmas!

Ha! The sweet smell of success now fills my home instead of Christmas. It's like Christmas never happened. The toys are in their new spots. My house is back to its old self. I don't want to hear a Christmas Carol or see Santa for at least ten more months.

Then, just like a giddy school girl, I will lovingly get all my Christmas decorations out the attic. I will carefully hang them up or put them on the tree. I'll fret if the table is festive enough. I'll worry that the outdoor lights are fun yet tasteful. I will excitedly count down the days until Santa comes with the kids. But until then, I'll enjoy my clean house.

Cheers!
Carolanne

Dear 2010

Dear 2010,

You were some kind of year. I have to say that I liked you better than 2009, but let's face it. 2009 set the bar so low that you didn't have to do much to exceed expectations.

These were the things that made this year spectacular. Chris and I completed a half marathon. My son turned one, went from speech delayed to talking in sentences and discovered Thomas the Train. My daughter started preschool, made and kept awesome friends, got two loose teeth and learned to swim.

We welcomed a new member to our family this year... our new house. It's a great, big, warm hug! This is definitely a highlight of 2010. 

www.BarkingWife.com launched in 2010. We had such a year of ups and downs when it came to finally launching our business, but it was worth every bit of worrying, agonizing, praying, texting, blood, sweat and tears to finally see our hard work live and in living color. I couldn't be more proud of www.BarkingWife.com than if it was one of my own children. I guess in a lot of ways, it is! I am so excited about what 2011 has in store for www.BarkingWife.com.


Okay 2011, here are the areas that I see that need improvement. I would really like to get this whole "Chronic Asthma" figured out with my son. It's been very hard to limit where and who he has contact with. I just want him to get to be a little boy again. Also, it would be nice if my daughter's kindergarten experience is a very positive one. I know that it's eight months away, but I have already begun to worry.

If I have to ask for something for myself, it would be awesome if we could add one extra hour to the day. I am convinced that if I had one extra child free hour a day, I could cure cancer, broker world peace and get a hot meal on the dinner table. Not too much to ask, right?

In all seriousness 2011, I ask that your bring healthy babies to all my expecting friends, bless my family with good health and give my children enough struggles to build character, but not enough to cripple them. I hope that one year from now that I will write this letter and say 2011 brought us more love, laughter and life than we ever thought possible.

Cheers,
Carolanne

Tall Boots to Fill

 If you are ever visiting here in Texas, or if you live here, you might hear someone say, “Those are mighty tall boots to fill”. Doing all the duties of a stay-at-home Mom of two young children, running www.BarkingWife.com AND getting ready for Christmas with all the family coming to stay at my home for holiday weekend, I have some mighty tall boots to fill! The holidays come with a lot of expectations of us women who keep everything going (or at least try to)(or at least think we keep it all going) during this hectic and over-scheduled time of year.  I think that I create a lot of extra stress by the expectations that I put on myself. Why do I always do that?  Well, here is how I try to explain it. When you can see in your mind how great an occasion could be, how much fun everyone would have, if you had time to bring to fruition all of the ideas and extra details that you can see in your mind, then it is really hard to NOT do them: especially when you know you have the ability to do them. The problem all comes down to time. There just isn’t enough time to do it all. Sooooooo, what you end up doing is using the time you should be sleeping to do more to try to fill those darn tall boots. And then you end up a cranky sleep deprived hostess wondering why it doesn’t feel like Christmas to you. Enough!

Me? This year, I’m going to let some of the fun ideas and creative details slide. I’m just not going to do them all. I’m going to let go of the big picture idea I have in my mind about how great and fun and cool the Christmas experience could be for everyone who is coming to my house this year. I’ve decorated the house so it looks festive, cozy, and merry. I’m going to pull out plenty of lap blankets so everyone can sit around and relax or nap or wrap up in to enjoy the season. I bought a big 1,500 piece puzzle that will be brought out and put on the dining table once all the Christmas dishes are cleared so that people can sit around and work the puzzle as they come and go over the long weekend. And lastly, I bought festive paper plates so I don’t have to constantly be doing the dishes after every meal. All the other great extra ideas I had are going to be saved for next year, or the year after, or whenever if ever.  I’m going to fill my tall boots with the magical moments and memories that Christmas brings… because that is what Santa would want (and my husband, children, family and friends too.) Enjoy the season!

Cheers,

Holly

The Big Day

(Read this post second if you haven't already read this one.)

Let's see! Where I last left off was the big run. It's half marathon run day. Let me set the scene. It was cold like below freezing cold. It was wet like pouring rain wet. It was early like before dawn early. Not really, but that's how I felt. It was in the low 40's. I'm a Texas girl. When it's 55 degrees its too cold to play outside. It was really damp, but it wasn't raining. I got the early part dead right.

Chris and I got up at 4:30 to get dressed and eat something. We went downstairs and stared at the food and at each other. At one point, we both started laughing because the scene was ridiculous. The lobby was filled with runners. They were pumped to be there and excited to "get going." We made death look healthy. Who wants to eat DURING THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT? Not me. I had a Diet Coke (drink of champions) and a banana. But, You weren't getting this girl to smile.

Melissa met us at our hotel and walked to the starting line about a 1.5 mile walk. It really seems pointless to drive when you're about to run 13.1 miles (Yes! the .1 is very important). We lined up by time that we thought it was take us to complete it. Oops! Guess what! I have to go to the bathroom. The line was long and the port-a-potty's were cold and gross. I just decided to hold it. I mean seriously. We are about to run 13.1 miles. My bladder was the least of my worries.

They fired the starting gun. Then, we just started walking to the start line. It's really quite counter intuitive to the whole starting gun sound. Finally, it was our turn. We hit the timing mat and off we started running. The course starts off up hill. Yes! The first three miles are up hill. This Texas girl trained on flat ground. It never occurred to me that the hills of Austin might be an issue. At mile marker one, I ran by a girl that had fallen and bloodied her knee. This is how desperate I was to quit this half marathon. I ENVIED HER! She had an excuse for not finishing. I so hoped that I would fall into a pot hole and have to be carried away on a stretcher.

At mile two, I stopped running at the water table. My legs ached. New muscles (yet to be developed) were screaming. It was very clear that I was not prepared to run hills. I took five minutes to sip a glass of water, go to the bathroom and have a "coming to Jesus" with myself. I hadn't trained for four months for this to quit now. I am not a quitter. Who cares if the hills are hard and my legs hurt. It's two hours of my life. I survived a serious car accident when I was 16. I birthed two children, one of them naturally. I just ran 10 miles after a year of very serious setbacks. I can do this.

So I did! I just started running. I fell in with a running group from Austin. They were kind enough to accept me into their pack. They taught me (talk about on the job training) how to run the hills of Austin. I learned that you wipe your snotty nose on your sleeve or your gloves (yucky!). I learned that if someone offers you a piece of sugary candy along the way that you accept it and suck on it. I also learned that the people that line the roads that hold signs and cheer for you can be very motivating.

I think we look pretty darn good
for just running 13.1 miles!

At about mile 11, we turned the corner and saw the State of Texas Capital Dome. It was the most beautiful thing that I have seen. Not the building, but the gentle slope downward toward it. I was almost finished.

I ran around the capital building and eyed the finish line. I had done it! My legs hurt so badly. My hips ached from running the hills. I had to go to the restroom like crazy. When I started the race a couple of hours before, I thought that I was running for my kids to show them I could accomplish my goal. I thought that I was running to prove that I could. In the end, I realized that I was running to escape the last two years of trauma to my body. In two hours and 36 minutes (includes my five minute stop to have a "comin' to Jesus" with myself), I had proven to myself that I could do anything that I put my mind to. I did this for me. The years of being pregnant and breastfeeding might have changed how I looked phyiscally but mentally, I was still tough as nails.

Almost a year later, I still get emotional as I write this. With time to reflect on my accomplishment, my half marathon was a big turning point in my life. I now run because I really enjoy it. I try to run about 20 miles a week. My next goal is a full marathon but not until my baby is in kindergarten. It takes so much time to train. Less than 1% of the world's population can say they've done one. I'm just adding it to the bucket list. I'm also mulling over a triathlon (the swimming part scares me).

When asked what piece of advice that I have for beginning runners, this is what I say. Make sure that you're doing it for the right reasons. If you're trying to lose weight or want a hobby to do with your friend or spouse, it's probably not enough motivation. Here's the practical advice. Run a few 5K and 10K's before the big race. If I had done that, I would have learned a whole about running in a group, maintaining a pace and most importantly, what to do with a drippy nose.

As we runners say, "just one more mailbox..."

Cheers,

Carolanne

This is now the reason that I run!

Thankful!

What am I thankful for? Isn't that the question of the week! I actually decided to reflect on this question this year and not give my usual "family and healthy children" answer. Don't get me wrong. I'm very thankful for my family and healthy children, but I wanted to not just say my answer but to feel my answer.

This year has been a really stressful year. Holly and I worked nonstop to launch www.BarkingWife.com and experienced some extreme highs and very low lows. My family and I moved. My little boy was diagnosed with chronic asthma and speech delayed. My daughter tried two new activities that ended in spectacular disasters. We went through the struggles of  a very sluggish housing market. I've had my own health issues to deal with. My husband has been very busy at work (good thing when you're in sales. Bad thing when you want to be home with your family).

2010 has taught me to always look for the silver lining. Here's how I made lemonade out of lemons...

• I have an awesome business partner. We work very well together. Some have said that it's a marriage made in heaven. We got through our tough times by trusting our gut and being each others rock. A good glass of wine also helps!
• Yes! My family and I moved. We love our new home. It is perfect for us, and it is where we want to raise our family. It was stressful (and still is), but it helps when you see how your family is using the new house with such love. It also helps when your daughter lists her new room as one of the things that she is thankful for.
• As for my little guys health, unfortunately no change in his asthma. We are living with it. The great news is that his language has picked up. Just this morning, I was rewarded with "Tank Uo Mommy!" His first sentence, I would like to believe, it's his way of saying thank you for all the long hours that I put in reading to him, carrying him around and showing him pictures.  It was worth every second to hear those beautiful words!
• Eventually, my daughter did learn to swim this year. In fact, she is pretty good. Gymnastics is just not her thing, but she is trying dance. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. All I want in the world is for her to find a physical activity that she loves.
• Our house did not sell, but we have the best renters in the whole world. God works in mysterious ways.
• Finally, after multiple doctors, I think that I might see the light at the end of the tunnel. Lesson learned. If you think that there is something wrong, don't take "no" for an answer.
• Well, my husband being busy at work is just not going to change. I'm not complaining. We are learning to work around his schedule, and we value the time that we do have together much more.
• Also, I'm thankful for the support of all the people that read this blog and have signed up for a www.BarkingWife.com account. Thank you! You'll never know what your support has meant to me.

At Thanksgiving dinner this year, when I'm asked what I'm thankful for, I'm still going to say "my family and healthy children," but this year is will mean so much more to me!

Thankful,
Carolanne

Can’t I Just Talk On The Phone in Peace for 60 Seconds?

Ring Ring…. Ring Ring…. (no anwer, voice mail message starting). “Please leave your message at the beep for Mr. So-in-So, President of highly recommended website company.” BEEEEP. Me, “Hi, this is Holly Donnelly and I am interested in talking with you about developing a web… [1 year old child finds me in my telephone talking hiding spot] [LOUD SCREAMING/CRYING] MA MAMAMA, BOOOO AHHHH, EEEEHHH,WAAHHH… [talking much louder now, I try to continue my sentence] UM, I GUESS YOU CAN TELL THAT I’M A STAY-AT-HOME MOM, AND I’M SORRY THAT MY 1 YEAR OLD IS SCREAMING SO LOUDLY, BUT I WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE YOU CALLING MY BACK…”I hang up, feeling embarrassed, panicky, frustrated. I have never sounded so unprofessional. I can’t imagine what will go through his mind when he hears that message. Why can’t I just talk on the phone for 60 seconds in peace?

It wasn’t that many years ago that I was single, no children working in a high rise, in an office with a door and a downtown view. It was quiet. My messages sounded like I was a professional. I had NO appreciation for that quiet environment.

But now, I have to come to grips with the fact that I’m a stay-at-home mom trying to build a business and that is what it is going to sound like when I’m on the phone. I can’t hide it. It doesn’t mean I’m any less professional, in fact it means I’m super human! I should be considered a super hero. Because, believe me, building a business while being a full time mom is one challenging and adventurous feat that requires super hero powers.

No call back. Ever. From that President of that highly recommended website development company. In hind sight, it’s no big deal, rather laughable; his loss because he missed out on developing a website for two stay-at-home Super Hero Moms.

Cheers,
Holly

Getting Ready for School...

In one week all of our babies begin school. Our four-year-olds have been in mother's day out since they were one. It was okay to let them enter the world of singing songs, sharing, nap mats and lunchs sitting down at a table. They needed the time spent learning to socialize and fun Bible stories. It was only two days a week. We were able to get grocery shopping done and doctors visits made without having to drag the babies along. Also, in the back of our minds we knew (hoped) that there would be another baby some day.

Wow! It's time for those babies (our one-year-olds) to begin mothers-day-out. All the anxiety of letting your children grow up has reared its ugly head. Will the teachers like them? Will they make friends? Will the teachers watch them like we do? Will they nap? I guess the biggest anxiety of all is that one that hurts every mom's heart. This is the first step in letting our babies grow up. This is the first step in them not needing us anymore. That's enough to make a BarkingWife shed a few tears...


Cheers,
Carolanne